S5 E2: Roseanne Road Trip!

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Dear listeners, we are back from our long fights against illness to finally bring you episode 2! We’re putting the Conners on pause for a moment to take a look back at some classic Roseanne — and who doesn’t love a road trip? We’ve selected two special episodes, season 4’s “Kansas City, Here We Come” and season 8’s “The Getaway, Almost,” that both feature Roseanne and Jackie hitting the road for some sisterly bonding, complex emotional and family shit, and Riot Grrrl music. In “Kansas City,” the women find out their father has been having a long-term affair and pile into Jackie’s big-rig to go meet his mistress. We discuss this episode’s incredible writing and performances, and consider how much of the Harris family story comes together in these mere 22 minutes. We also look at how its subtle feminism compares to the much more in-your-face “The Getaway,” which acts as Thelma and Louise reference, Riot Grrrl primer, and mid-1990s pop culture handbook all at once. And: Jenna Elfman as Garland, the least edgy Riot Grrrl with the perfect ’90s shag! Slide on into the passenger seat and ride along with us! Plus digressions on Jeffrey Dahmer-related programming, Halloween faves, Thelma and Louise‘s continued relevance, Amy Sherman-Palladino’s genius for family dynamics, and more!

S5 E1: Multiple Marriages/Maniacs

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Dear listeners: Ready or not, we are back again for a FIFTH season of Conners madness! As usual, we’re playing catch up, recapping the final two episodes of season 4, “Three Ring Circus,” and “A Judge and a Priest Walk into a Living Room…” That’s right – The Conners is celebrating yet another wedding, this time a double (almost triple)! We debate whether the show’s insistence on these kinds of attention-grabbing plots points has it creeping into Roseanne-season-9-territory, and lament the fact that The Conners continually seems to introduce new characters with potential only to quickly throw them away (like Aldo). We also can’t help but do what we do best: harp. Mainly on the fact that Jackie’s previous marriage to Fred (and baby Andy) seems to have been wiped clean from the Roseanne-a-verse. But why, we ask, WHY?! Of course, there are some things to enjoy about these episodes, particularly the hilarious Joe Walsh, the presence of Jerry Gergich from Parks and Rec (Jim O’Heir), Harris as tattoo artist, and some cute sisterly moments between Becky and Darlene.

We also follow some delightful tangents on subjects such as the extremely risqué British dating show Naked Attraction, Netflix’s The Sandman, Catholicism, Casio keyboard demo songs, and the Quantum Leap reboot. Join us!

NOTE: We had some audio and connection issues this episode and we know they are obnoxious to the ear. We apologize for the poor sound quality! The issues will be fixed for episode 2.

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S4 E13: When a Ghost House Isn’t Good Enough (and Other Stories)

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In our latest episode, we start to wind down season 4 of The Conners with a close look at “Big Negotiations and Broken Expectations” and “The Best Laid Plans, a Contrabassoon, and a Sinking Feeling.” First we confront a new frontier in Dan and Louise’s relationship, as they have their first serious fight as a married couple. (We have to say, we’re mostly on Team Louise, even if she did foolishly suggest that Dan renovate a house). We also continue to follow Darlene’s funeral-home-renovating adventure, which leads her to request a raise and say some not-very-Marxist things about the line workers at Wellman. This causes us to once again ask: Really, Darlene? But one thing we actually AREN’T judgmental about is Darlene and Ben’s reconciliation, which was a long time coming. They both have their issues, but we’re rooting for these two kids — and we hope they get their his-and-hers sinks! We’re also rooting for Mark, who has a notion in his head that he must learn the contrabassoon, and he must learn it from Bev’s friend Doc Brown, a.k.a. Christopher Lloyd, who is a snob and a half. To which we say: DON’T TEASE US WITH BEV, Conners writers, unless Estelle Parsons is going to appear before our very eyes!

Tune in for all this plus our discussions of the logistics of Ben’s beard trimming, Katherine’s hatred of Ketchup, and our deep and undying love for Heartstopper, Kit Connor, Olivia Coleman, and…everything else about Heartstopper. Did we mention we love Heartstopper? Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts and Spotify!

S4 E10: A Legacy of Snooping

In our latest installment, we discuss The Conners episode “Hot for Teacher and Writing a Wrong,” in which Becky falls for her psychology professor (Matt Walsh) and Darlene accuses Mark of selling drugs — when he’s actually selling college admissions essays. We cringe as Becky’s interest in education gives way to questionable “feelings for” a professor she barely knows, and hope this doesn’t jeopardize her studies. We also consider Darlene’s Roseanne-esque tendency to snoop behind Mark’s back, and compare her plot line with the Roseanne season two episode “No Talking,” in which Roseanne searches Becky’s room and is tempted to read her diary. We ponder whether Darlene is a more permissive parent than Roseanne and analyze the generational differences between Becky and Mark’s 14-year-old drama: Becky’s “leave me alone, I hate you” approach vs. Mark’s the tell-the-truth and offer a rational explanation approach.

Join us for all this plus Maura’s detailed thoughts on Olympic figure skating and discussions of teacher-student relationships, diaries, and more. Listen and subscribe on Apple podcasts!

S4 E9: Darlene’s Dilemma

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In our latest episode, we discuss The Conners S4 E11, “Patriarch’s and Goddesses,” a great hangout episode which features the one and only JOE WALSH of The Eagles (as Aldo’s dad). We revel in this old-school storyline that features Walsh’s character drinking beer with Dan, mooching, rambling, and ultimately jamming (with John Goodman on harmonica) over the closing credits. Just like the old days! (Spoiler alert: Katherine admits she likes the f-ckin’ Eagles.) We also enjoy this episode’s thoughtful Darlene storyline, in which she’s unable to handle Ben’s new lady-friend and must grapple with her difficulties in making the relationship work. This caused us to look back to a Darlene-centric episode from the original series, “Daughters and Other Strangers,” in which Darlene once again puts up a tough front to hide the fact that she’s scared to go to art school without David.

Join us for this Darlene deep-dive plus our thoughts on the following: natural deodorant, patchouli, and memories; what makes a good ’80s night; why Pat Benetar is always on the radio constantly all the time; the white wine age-cheapness continuum; and why Ghost World is our fave. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts!

S4 E8: Don’t Go Chasin’ Waterbeds

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In our new episode, we discuss The Conners “Three Exes, Role Playing and A Waterbed” and “Spills, Pills and The Midnight Lasagna” — but first, we have to get down to business re: our sadness over the recent passing of so many icons of television, music and film, particularly Betty White and Ronnie Spector (little-known fact: Ronnie sang the theme song to Roseanne Barr’s short-lived cartoon show Little Rosey!). We also dig into all the great stuff we’ve been watching over the holidays, namely Yellowjackets and The Beatles: Get Back. We’re head over heels for these shows and we’ll shout it from the rooftops!

But we’re also enjoying The Conners, especially these two zippy episodes that seem, frankly, inspired by our podcast, from the waterbed storyline and very familiar comforter (The Conners, WHY ARE YOU STEALING OUR MEMORIES) to Darlene’s decision to call it quits with the man we have taken to calling Fake Fred Savage. As usual, we enjoy dissecting Darlene’s relationship woes, praising Jay R. Ferguson’s hair, and sinking our teeth into some excellent storylines involving Jackie and Neville and Mark’s Saved by the Bell-esque obsession with pills (he’s so excited…he’s so…scared!). Flop down on your Big Sur waterbed and sail away with us! Listen and subscribe on Apple podcasts.

S4 E6: Mothers and Daughters and Birth Control Pills

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In our latest, we discuss The Conners episode “Let’s All Push Our Hands Together for the Stew Train and The Conners’ Furniture” (ugh, that title!) in tandem with one of Roseanne‘s most memorable Very Special Episodes, “A Bitter Pill to Swallow,” in which Becky asks Roseanne to help her get birth control pills. We take a close look at Darlene and Harris’s fraught relationship and how they might be able to mend it after years of choosing control and defiance over mutual understanding and compassion. We compare Darlene’s parenting with Roseanne and Dan’s strategies (with Jackie’s help) in navigating Becky’s choice to have a sexual relationship with Mark and, above all, take responsibility for her life and health. We also can’t help but tie the conversation around birth control and women’s choices in these episodes to the threats currently facing abortion rights in this country. Join us as we dig deep into these mother-daughter dynamics and issues of women’s agency, plus discussion of Designing Women, Murder, She Wrote, and our dislike of fake Fred Savages.

S4 E4: Lanford Bridal

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It’s the big day for Dan and Louise — the first official wedding on The Conners in the episode “The Wedding of Dan and Louise”! We analyze this episode’s frenzied path to the altar and discuss its relationship with the two most momentous Roseanne original series wedding episodes, “Altar Egos” (Jackie + Fred’s) and “The Wedding” (David + Darlene). As usual, there’s a whole lot happening on the The Conners — Louise is getting cold feet, Darlene and Ben are sniping at each other, Becky and Mikey are doing it in the bathroom, Brian Austin Green is being a charming idiot, and Harris is dating a man we’re pretty sure is Kato Kaelin. We wish for a little more time for reflection for Dan and Louise, whose vows are interrupted by the slowest-moving tornado in history, and for some more Louise-centric scenes, while appreciating some consistent character dynamics and relationship reverberations from the original series through the present-day Conners. Meander with us through all this and additional discussion of Halloween, The L Word: Generation Q, the new Child’s Play series, and the homoerotic camp masterpiece Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge. Listen and subscribe on Apple podcasts!

S2 E7: Slap That Turkey!

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Thanksgiving is upon us, with an OPEN HAND. In this episode, we cover the dramatic holiday episode of The Conners, “Slappy Holidays,” wherein voices are raised not in mirth and merriment, but in anger and probable tequila drunkenness. Jackie, Darlene, and Harris are all at their worst, while the rest of the family copes with the mayhem. In the episode, a delayed dinner and too much booze leads to a MAJOR blowout, culminating in a SLAP, that brings us back to the history of abuse in the Harris family. It’s painful, emotional, upsetting, and therefore utterly true to the holiday, and to the original series. We also revisit classic Roseanne Thanksgiving episodes and the history of delightful melee among the Conners and Harrises. Highlights include turtleneck philosophies, tales of Maura’s talent show exploits, and Conner memories in garage stories. Please enjoy!

S2 E1: Becky is a Real Gas!

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Welcome back to 714 Delaware St. We are launching Season 2 in time for the upcoming second season of The Connors, our most beloved TV family.

Our inaugural episode, however, returns to another throwback: one of the most explosive episodes of Roseanne, entitled “Inherit the Wind.” You may remember this classic episode as the one in which Becky…Cuts…The…(ahem…if you don’t already know, you probably better listen).

We do a lot of digressing for fun chats about Romy and Michelle, Blade, Q Anon, high school mascots, and more. But(t), it all keeps coming back to what may be the most iconic performances of Lecy Goranson and Sarah Gilbert’s time on Roseanne, and probably the most perfectly delivered line of all time.

Thank you for listening!