S3 E5: Becky & Mark 4 Ever

Well, we hope you’ve all been enjoying safe and happy holidays. We’ve been on a bit of a break ourselves, though we will be back with more commentary on The Conners and more of the old show soon! In this episode, we revisit the elopement of Becky and Mark Healy (RIP Mark and beautiful Glenn Quinn), which is portrayed in the back-to-back Season 5 episodes “Terms of Estrangement,” parts 1 and 2. We find Becky to be egregiously hard on Dan as the bike shop goes under, and we spend quite a lot of time on the ways the financial situation the Conners find themselves in here connects to their current situation on The Conners. We celebrate the writers of the original series for their one-liners, non-sequiturs, and inclusion of the ever-vain Nancy and her newly liposuctioned butt. In all, we remember how young our Becky was, but how much she loved Mark (and he loved her, too!). As per usual, we digress into realms of pop culture only somewhat related to the topic at hand. Thanks again to Brenda for suggesting we take some time to cover these two kids in love.

S2 Ep 15: Bev!

In this podcast episode, we focus in on the dowager Harris, Bev. The world’s nitpicking-est mom, the devotion-seeking grandmother, the ever-youthful-and-probably-a-vampire Bev, so perfectly portrayed by also likely-to-be immortal Estelle Parsons. We begin by talking about recent The Conners episode, “The Ice Woman Cometh,” which finds Bev returned to Lanford with money in hand for precious Mark’s summer camp for smartypants. Darlene pursues equal money for Harris, betraying the deserving Mark in cold fashion. We question Harris’s inexplicable new career aspiration – to go to tattoo school (Listen. That’s really not a thing.) And Dan’s heart breaks over Louise, but at least we get to see Katey Segal rock with a full band. Next, we discuss the similar original series episode from Season 5, entitled “Mommy Nearest,” wherein Bev gives Jackie and Roseanne $10,000 each from her divorce settlement, with the caveat that she’s moving to Lanford. You can imagine how Jackie and Dan react. There’s a LOT of horse talk in this episode, as well as a detailed description of a totally problematic Jackie sweater, and a rant connecting Breaking Bad and Tiger King. Please join us!

S2, Episode 7: Slap That Turkey!

Thanksgiving is upon us, with an OPEN HAND. In this episode, we cover the dramatic holiday episode of The Conners, “Slappy Holidays,” wherein voices are raised not in mirth and merriment, but in anger and probable tequila drunkenness. Jackie, Darlene, and Harris are all at their worst, while the rest of the family copes with the mayhem. In the episode, a delayed dinner and too much booze leads to a MAJOR blowout, culminating in a SLAP, that brings us back to the history of abuse in the Harris family. It’s painful, emotional, upsetting, and therefore utterly true to the holiday, and to the original series. We also revisit classic Roseanne Thanksgiving episodes and the history of delightful melee among the Conners and Harrises. Highlights include turtleneck philosophies, tales of Maura’s talent show exploits, and Conner memories in garage stories. Please enjoy!

S2, Episode 5: Let Your Dreams Come True!

In this episode, we discuss the semi-Halloweeny “Nightmare on Lunchbox Street” episode of The Conners Season 2.  The revelation that Bev is still the owner of the building the old Lunchbox was in and that Darlene now has power of attorney over Bev gives us pause. We delight in Jackie’s justified rage at the audacity of Bev! Can you imagine—having that nest egg this whole time and STILL forcing Jackie to take care of her? Though there are some costumes, this episode doesn’t go all out on the holiday spookiness, and maybe that’s a good thing. Nevertheless, Laurie Metcalf and Lecy Goranson pull out all the stops on Jackie and Becky as detectives on the case of the lying grandma, and Estelle Parsons is probably a vampire, since she seriously does NOT AGE!  Notably, we both wish the “DJ and Mary Thing” were its own episode, but we are excited to find out if the Lunchbox returns. To add to the fun, Maura has some fun Lunchbox and loose meat trivia!  Thanks for listening!